Regrets

I started this blog as an outlet of how helping others fostered me and hopefully someone else. Today I read a blog that was written by a friends wife. It really made me think about what I do daily and if I will have any regrets tomorrow.

I think we all have done things that we later regret. I know I have done many things in my life that I wish that I had not. But we can not change those things. We must go on and take the lesson we have learned from each mistake. The hardest thing is to go back and apologize to try and right our wrong. It's something that as I have gotten older I strive to do.

When I was younger I was hurt in many ways by an adult who I should trust. For along time I held anger against her, but one year through church camp I learned to forgive her. I even learned that I really should love this person. That maybe one day she will grow in Gods love from my love. I actually recently sent her a blanket called "A Blanket of Love". It was a little piece of every project that I knitted or crocheted for the last 4 years. It might have been ugly to most, but it was beautiful to me. I felt comfort under it as I worked on it. I felt the love I had put into each piece of my work. So I decide it needed to go to someone who needed love. So I mailed it to my real mother. As an adult it actually made me feel that I really forgave her. It felt good! I regret I hadn't done this sooner.

So a Sunday later I went to church and a service really hit me. For 2 years now I have had some anger in my heart. A man assaulted my kids at a church gathering. I have not been able to see this man or his family for the last 2 years without having some type of anger. The sad thing is I could not walk into my families church without that feeling. I had promised myself that my kids would never be touched as i had. So the anger was more then just what he had done to my kids, but how he had broken my promise. So the service I went to was about forgiveness. All of the topics I was struggling with in my heart that I did not realize were brought up. Then he played a video of a couple in our church and of the utter forgiveness that a wife gave. It was during this service that I finally forgave. I have spent the last few weeks regretting my anger. B

But back to my friend, she really needs some prayers. She is an inspiration and her blog this morning like that church service that has inspired me really has me thinking. We each need to try and think before we do and not regret. We never know what will happen tomorrow.

Sorry for the long blog and rattling on, but this is one of my ways to get my feelings out and hopefully to help someone else in the process.